Trigger Warning: This poem contains information which may be triggering to survivors.

Trigger Point

One minute,
I’m in a car
radio playing
world rushing.
feeling happy
feeling free

but then –

music blaring,
suddenly I can’t
get away
I can’t
leave

Now I’m
elsewhere:
trash speakers
trash song

radio playing
world rushing
feeling frightened
feeling trapped

music blaring,
suddenly I can’t
get away
I can’t
leave.

*

One minute,
I’m in a gym
sweat dripping
muscles burning.
feeling strong
feeling safe

but then –

arms trembling,
suddenly I can’t
get up
I can’t
breathe

Now I’m
elsewhere:
dirty house
dirty sheets

sweat dripping
muscles burning
feeling helpless
feeling weak

arms trembling,
suddenly I can’t
get up
I can’t
breathe.

*

One minute,
I’m in a clinic
lights blazing
legs hanging
feeling restless
feeling bored

But then –

pain searing
suddenly I can’t
get out
I can’t
stop

Now I’m
elsewhere:
heavy moment
heavy man

lights blazing
legs hanging
feeling empty
feeling cold

pain searing
suddenly I can’t
get out
I can’t
stop.